It’s that time of the year when tourists descend upon New Orleans like a bunch of drunk and shirtless locusts. Middle aged conventioneers with names like Stew and Skip take up with sorority girls, frat boys, and Lousianans alike in America’s spring break: Mardi Gras. Yes, it’s that time of year, but it isn’t all bad for the good people of NOLA — they get free jewelry.

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